Fag Hag

BECAUSE EVERY QUEEN NEEDS THEIR CROWN! ✨

Hey there, honorary queen! This isn't just any tank – it's your official "Yes, They're All My Gay Boyfriends" uniform! Available in two fierce shades:
• Notorious Navy: giving "queen of the gays" energy
• Bold Black: serving "honorary homosexual" realness

✨ WHY THIS TANK IS YOUR NEXT PRIDE MOVE:
• 100% Australian cotton softer than your gay bestie's drama
• Design bolder than your last brunch entrance
• Fits like your spot in the chosen family
• Made-to-order because fruit flies aren't basic
• Perfect for showing off those shopping-trained arms

👕 THE FABULOUS DETAILS:
• Premium cotton that feels better than spilling the tea
• Print that stays fierce longer than a drag show
• Easy-care fabric that's more reliable than Grindr dates
• Proudly made in Australia with extra ally energy
• Sleeveless for maximum dancing potential

💃 HOW TO WERK YOUR STATUS:
• Rock it to pride events as the ally you are
• Perfect for gay brunch domination
• Ideal for those "yes, they're ALL my gays" moments
• Style it with that "honorary rainbow" confidence
• Great for turning every gay bar into your kingdom

👑 MORE THAN JUST A STATEMENT:
This isn't just a tank – it's your way of saying "I'm Not Gay, But My Boyfriends Are!" Plus, you're supporting an Australian LGBTQIA+ owned business that celebrates chosen family!

⚡️ WHY THIS BELONGS IN YOUR ALLY WARDROBE:
• It's basically your gay credentials
• Perfect for those "queen of the queers" days
• Makes your role clearer than your drink order
• Because basic ally wasn't your destiny
• Looks better on you than heteronormative ever did

🚨 WARNING: HANDLE WITH CARE:
• May cause excessive gay boyfriend acquisition
• Could result in spontaneous Broadway singalongs
• Might make straight bars feel boring
• Will definitely increase your brunch invitations
• Side effects include:
   - Uncontrollable sass development
   - Being everyone's favourite ally
   - Getting more "yasss queen" than your ears can handle
   - Making other allies step up their game
   - Being too iconic for straight spaces

Ready to claim your crown? Hit that 'Add to Cart' button faster than your gays can say "Spill the tea!" Because being a fruit fly isn't just a title – it's a lifestyle! 

P.S. This tank pairs perfectly with:
• Your gay emergency kit
• That "one of the girls" energy
• Your collection of pride flags
• Being everyone's favourite ally
• The ability to out-dance the straights
• Your "honorary rainbow" attitude 

BONUS FEATURES:
Perfect for:
• Pride celebrations
• Gay brunches
• Drag shows
• Being the designated drama manager
• Living your best ally life
• Collecting more gay boyfriends
• Being the queen you were chosen to be

Note: May cause extreme levels of chosen family energy and sudden increases in fabulous friendships. Side effects may include: proud ally moments, impromptu dance breaks, and the irresistible urge to mother all baby gays!